Gramalkyn Wins Court Battle

After almost three years of fighting the system, and crippling legal fees, the Fearless Furball finally prevailed in the 5th Circuit Court.

The Purring Politician tried to enter the New Hampshire primary in 1995. The Election Commission denied his application even though he had more than enough signatures. They relied on The Constitution whch prevents him from running as it clearly reads that one must be 35 years of age to be President!

"His Furriness" filed suit seeking relief. The lower courts denied his appeal time and time again. Totally frustrated with his lawyers he fired the #$%tards and argued his case, pro se.

Our Surreptitious Statesman made a compelling argument before the honourable court. He emphatically stated,

"Our legal system is based on English Common Law. If something is generally accepted it becomes law even though the statutes do not address it. It is common knowledge that one human year equals 7 cat years. My age is 8 which obviously translates into 56 human years; hence, I am well qualified in respect of age! ".

"Further I sayeth naught and rest my case."

In a 5-2 decision the lower court was reversed. Justice last!

Return to main menu